Cheney U - "I felt better after I did it"

Quote Of The Day

"To announce that there must be no criticism of the President, or that we are to stand by the President, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public. "

--Theodore Roosevelt

Mark Twain

History Doesn't Repeat Itself, but It Often Rhymes

Mark Twain

Submitted by cvining on 2024-07-11

History doesn't repeat itself, but It often rhymes

-- Mark Twain, Attributed to, but no citation is known

Banjo

Mark Twain

Submitted by cvining on 2023-07-17

A gentleman is someone who knows how to play the banjo and doesn't.

-- Mark Twain

A starving dog

Mark Twain

Submitted by cvining on 2023-02-07

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

-- Mark Twain

Redundant

Mark Twain

Submitted by cvining on 2022-12-03

To commit suicide in Buffalo is redundant

-- Mark Twain, That famous line from "A Chorus Line" -- "To commit suicide in Buffalo is redundant" -- has been claimed by many authors. According to the original cast members and crew, Neil Simon was called in by Michael Bennett to serve as play doctor. In their soon-to-be-published book "The Longest Line: Broadway's Most Singular Sensation, 'A Chorus Line,' " Gary Stevens and Alan George tell the story of the record-breaking musical in the form of an oral history augmented by photographs. Neil Simon told the co-authors in an interview: "The joke about Buffalo. Sometimes I think I wrote it, and then I'm pretty sure that Mark Twain wrote it. I sometimes think it was in the show before me, and yet there's a part of my mind that says I wrote it, and there's a part of my mind that says it's an old joke that was written by somebody like Mark Twain, and it wasn't Buffalo, it was someplace else, like Philadelphia or something."

When I was 14

Mark Twain

Submitted by cvining on 2022-03-13

When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.

-- Mark Twain, Widely attributed, probably inaccurately since Mark Twain’s father died when he was eleven years old

Faith

Mark Twain

Submitted by cvining on 2019-12-23

Faith is believing what you know ain't so

-- Mark Twain, Pudd'nhead Wilson's New Calendar

Mark Twain